Restart
by mistycrow
Summary: "He never thought he would be a child's parent figure: not this quickly, not this way. He thought they had more time together. Neither of them expected this to happen - that's what made it so hard." - In which Yato reincarnates.


**AN:** I wanted to write a story like this for quite some time but couldn't think of a good way to write it and kept pushing it at the back of my head. It was until I came across a story on this website that dealt with the same idea (you should check it – I'm not including the name because I didn't ask permission from the author, but it was recently published). It made me want to write this story, so here it is. Tell me if there are any mistakes – I wrote this while _pretending_ to listen to my psychology lecture so there can be a few problems.

On a side note; I am now (trying) to do beta-reading. I don't know how it works but it looks pretty exciting.

I hope you will all like this story. There is a small spoiler somewhere, but I don't think after reading the manga and watching Aragoto's 12th episode it'll come as a surprise to anyone.

Enjoy and please tell me how you felt about it. I appreciate every comment!

 **Restart**

 _Yukine… Can you promise me something?_

Yukine wakes up in the morning and pulls the child out of bed. The small arms of the boy wrap around his neck and hug him tightly as he is carried to the bathroom. It's not like the child can't walk on his own. Yukine wants to do this, because he knows how much the boy likes it when Yukine picks him up and carries him around.

He's spoiling the kid, he knows; he shouldn't be this soft on him. He should teach him, be strict and make sure the boy doesn't turn out to be a dark, bloodthirsty killer - he should make sure the kid has a different childhood this time.

He wants him to be _happy_ over everything else. That's his primary goal. That's what he wants the most. He wants to be the person who makes this child happy and he will protect the naive, pure and kind soul of this kid even if it costs his life.

 _It's important… Don't cry now, I need you to be strong._

Every day, Yukine puts the child down for breakfast and thank Daikoku for preparing two plates instead of one. He used to skip Yato's breakfast and he would be forced to prepare something for himself - but that has changed now.

Yukine helps the kid eat and makes sure he is full before he starts his own plate. He makes sure the boy wipes his hands and mouth and brushes his teeth. It feels like he's his father, or mother.

He never thought he would be a child's parent figure: not this quickly, not this way. He thought they had more time together.

Neither of them expected this to happen - that's what made it so hard.

 _I don't think I can survive this, Yukine. Hey, now. A crying kid is the last thing I need right now. You have to be strong!_

When the breakfast is done, Yukine helps the boy change his clothes, holds his hand and they walk around the city.

The child, of course, doesn't know anything. He keeps asking Yukine questions - _"What is that? What is it called? What does that do? Does it have anything to do with me? Can we go there? Can we see this? Can I eat those?"_ \- and they never seem to end. Yukine doesn't hate it though, not always. Mostly, these childish questions amuse him. He enjoys explaining everything to the small kid, holding his hand and never letting go, not even once. He listens to every word that escapes Yukine's mouth as if every little thing is important. He's always smiling and his eyes are always shining whenever Yukine starts talking to him, with the soft voice of a patient parent.

They probably look like brothers, but Yukine can't call the kid that. For him, their relationship is more complicated.

Most of the time, Yukine likes the kid's admiration. The other times, it stabs his heart and he wants to run, run, run as far as he could and leave the kid behind. He wants to hide in a cave and escape from the responsibilities which piled upon him so suddenly and harshly.

Of course he can't. This child needs him, much more than Yukine can truly understand. He realizes this when the kid looks at him with big, hopeful, helpless eyes that hold nothing but an undying trust. There is a sudden feeling that haunts Yukine many nights - he is the only person this kid truly knows and everything he does will affect him drastically. He will trust his word without asking questions.

This makes him think twice before doing anything at all, because it is a hard responsibility. He can't mess it up.

 _I want to ask you one thing. This might sound a bit cheesy… But I need you to answer me before I go._

Hiyori simply adores this child. She loves him so much that Yukine sometimes thinks her love might surpass his devotion to the child. Of course, their relationships are different. Yukine can feel nothing but a loyal, eternal _commitment_ and maybe even love (not that he will admit it out loud to anyone other than the kid) while Hiyori is allowed to walk away - of course Yukine doesn't want her to leave them, but he would understand her reasons if she were to end this.

She doesn't. Instead, she patiently and loyally cares for the child and makes sure Yukine gets to rest while she takes care of it. Yukine watches from the couch as she plays with the child and he thinks, for the nth time, how much he needs Hiyori's help.

He would be lost if he was to care for the child alone. Kofuku doesn't look too interested, Daikoku has a bitter smile on his face every time he looks at his small face, Kazuma doesn't help much because he never went through something like this, Bishamon tries her best but it's not much help either; the only person who could really help is himself a small child who doesn't remember a thing about his previous life.

 _Yukine… I'm going to die here. I don't know if I will be able to reincarnate, but…_

He never complains. He doesn't complain when the child wakes him up in the middle of the night and asks for his stories. He doesn't say a word when the boy pulls his sleeve a little too hard, demands to hold his hands, ignores his homework or private time and makes sure he is the center of Yukine's attention all the time. He doesn't even make a face when the small child acts like he is the only person Yukine can and should pay attention to, only person he can like, only person that really matters.

Because that is actually the case, and Yukine can never lie about it.

So he wakes up every night for him. He dresses him, feeds him, helps him with his bath, makes sure he turns out well and educated and _nice_. That is all he can do after all. This is the only way he can pay back for everything this child had done for him - when he wasn't a child.

He started feeling overprotective of him the second this child appeared before him, with his torn clothes and big, blue eyes that looked curious and scared. He immediately felt affection when this child said his name, like it was the most natural thing to do. He hugged him and cried, happy and sad tears mixed together and fell on his dark hair, making him panic and ask Yukine what's wrong. Yukine just laughed and cried and hugged the small child; because everything was wrong, yet everything was right.

 _If I do come back, can you… Would you please, be my shinki again?_

Yukine would never hate this child.

He isn't Yato. He didn't act like Yato; he didn't talk like the way his stupid master talked, he didn't make perverted jokes, he didn't brag about his _hafuri_ , he didn't steal his money, he didn't stink of sweat, he didn't make stupid remarks, he didn't answer his phone with the usual catchphrase - _Fast and affordable, Delivery God Yato at your service! -_ and he didn't remember anything.

He did remember Yukine though. He remembered his _hafuri_ and he trusted him. He still wanted to be a popular God who brings people joy. He wanted to be rich and well-known. He wanted to be loved.

Sometimes, this wasn't enough and Yukine wanted to hate this child. _He wasn't Yato_ , his master wasn't this child. He wanted to scream this at his small face and leave him with Hiyori, not able to bear with it much longer. Every time he looked at this boy's face he remembered Yato dying, in his arms, asking him to promise him - _be my shinki again, please_ \- and he felt his heart break into pieces.

This child isn't Yato, Yukine repeats every time he wakes up and sees a smiling face looking at him with a kind of love that Yukine never thought possible.

Yet Yukine loves this child so much, so very much that he can ignore this and make a new Yato out of this pure child. He isn't his master right now, but he will be, in time he will be his Yato.

" _I will. I promise."_

It wasn't the promise that kept Yukine there with Yato. The God didn't have to ask Yukine for a promise like that - and they both knew it - after all, it was just an insurance. It was the last thing Yato wanted to hear before he closed his eyes, because who knew if he would reincarnate or not. He wanted to know Yukine would be there before he left them.

It was the comforting warmth of the child in his arms as he slept on their shared futon and felt his relaxed breathing. It was the way Yato trusted Yukine and looked at him like he was the most important person on earth.

It was seeing how much Yato loved him for the first time, because his Yato, the previous Yato was a grown up with a dark, bloodied past and he didn't want to attach to a person too much (just in case they left him). It was realizing just how much this new Yato needed him and how similar this need was to his own when he first opened his eyes as the God's shinki.

So every night Yukine hugs the child close and hopes his heart will heal and he will be a good guidepost to this child God.


End file.
